What stops you from being happy?

What stops you from being happy?

According to our inbox this morning we will be happy when we:

· buy the “most powerful sales tool in the world”

· “ make a small step to success and get more information about our management system now”

· follow the “how to get exactly what I want from my hosting provider”

· “to impress” her by buying viagra or whatever

· “what if you could install a new ability into your mind by just sitting back and taking a deep breath”

Obviously, what stops us from being happy is our inability to buy a number of services that will generate either a vast amount of money or improve my sexuality.

The general message appears to be that happiness comes with…………..the freedom to do what I want, when I want. Happiness is the ability to buy a large house, a large car, a yacht and have the system to constantly generate money etc etc etc.

But our meditation teacher tells us this is not true. She says, the biggest hurdle- the one thing- that stops us from achieving happiness is OUR DESIRES.

She says; the more you want, the more unhappy you will become, the less satisfied you will be.

Let’s just think about this for a moment.

You sit and generate a goal. Then you don’t reach the goal in the time frame you set. Then, if you are like us, you get so upset and angry.

Have you ever thought about this? Really thought about it?

To our meditation teacher the search for happiness through material things is illusionary. We are kidding ourselves even trying this route. We are on a hiding to nothing. There is no way we can get what we want using this method. The very fact that we have material desires and we spend our lives trying to achieve them can only result in misery and unhappiness. Wealth Yes but happiness ????

Happiness is achieved by being successful.

Being a successful human being rather than a successful human doing.
Being someone who is driven by their needs rather than wants

By actually looking inside yourself and finding out who you really are, instead of what you want to become.

Learning to love yourself and therefore being able to love others. Being tolerant of yourself and therefore being tolerant of others. Co-operating with yourself and then naturally co-operating with others.

What is it about us that we are driven by wants rather than needs?

What would happen if we changed the scenario? Instead of being driven by wants we allowed ourselves to be driven by needs?

What do you need to make you happy?
What do you need to live a comfortable life? Not what do you want. What do you need?
How much do you need to feed your family?
How much do you need to pay for a place to live that will house your family? Not what do you want?

This philosophy is best described by Evelyn Rodriguez in her blog Crossroads Despatches dated 26^th December when she returns to Maprao resort a year after the Tsunami. She meets up again with the “manager” of the resort, Tan, who saved everyone in the resort through his actions.

"What will be, will be," says Tan when we first begin chatting.

"You must keep your mind strong. If you cannot control yourself, you cannot help others."

"Paradise is inside," he pats his chest, "in the heart."

And patting his crown, "And hell is in the mind."

In a nutshell. It’s the opposite of what we are taught. If we go out there in pursuit of happiness it all ends in tears but if we understand ourselves and become stable within ourselves then happiness automatically follows us like a shadow.

As we sit at the bamboo table, Tan says,

"If you do good, you have good." "If you do bad, you get bad."

Good Luck

Graham and Julie
www.desktop-meditation.com